I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
