Grow some girl-balls and come out already
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
