So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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