i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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