What a fucking waste of an outfit
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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