I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
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