At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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