Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
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