She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
