i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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