Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
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