you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
