He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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