Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Randomize
