Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Randomize
