so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
