i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
