plz talk dirty to me
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
