yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
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