You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
