I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
sex in a hospital.. check
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
