have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Randomize
