The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I'm determined to sit on that face.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Randomize