Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Randomize
