sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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