question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
My legs feel like baby dolphins
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Randomize
