yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
