My pussy is not your playground.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Drake has all the answers
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
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