How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Randomize
