I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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