Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
