She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Boobs speak an international language.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
