She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Randomize
