Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
You had me at "let me see your balls"
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
