Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
