i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
