her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize