Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
