I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
