You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
