I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
