I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
