My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
