I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
