I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
We're too hungover to prance.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
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