you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
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