Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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