That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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