why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
