I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Randomize
