I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
So squirting runs in the family.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Randomize